someone had urged me to update. well.... i really wanted to do so. but my mind was blank whenever i faced the computer. last week was a pretty stressed week for me. be it at work or social life.

i realised that most of my friends wanted a happy ending for both charles and i. but it was impossible. i also met met up with kaizhong and kailing. kailing was pretty harsh when she bought the matter up. she had been questioning me, "did he treat you badly?" so many times. and i had to assure her that it had nothing to do with the way charles treated me. yes. i admited that he treat me REALLY REALLY good. but somehow feelings do fade as time goes by. i couldn't bring myself to decieve him that i was still in love with him. isn't that being unfair to him? i do feel the pressure my friends gave me. but sometimes i just simply brushed off. if i couldn't take it, i just let my tears to flow. till now, i hadn't cry out loud.. mum also started questioning me bit by bit. and what am i suppose to say? told her that i'm in love with this guy called jason (where she happened to see us at the void deck)? i couldn't bring myself to said that. all i knew was that if i told her, her nagging will start. i know she means well. but sometimes i really need to have some peace... even my bro had started the ball rolling, telling my mum that i got a new bf... my mind is in a whirl... i had to assure my friends before i could really move on...