still feeling blue today.. the colour of the text and the background music describes what i currently feel now.. feel like an outcast.. outcast... bb said that i think too much but things weren't longer the same anymore.. i HATE this semester.. i HATE poly.. am i at fault? is it because of my personality? i'm a quiet person. i'm not a happy-go-lucky person as what many people percieved. whenever i dun feel like talking, i just sat beside them to listen to their conversation.. they seemed to be in their own world and i just sat there admiring them. since young, i had been very "gu pi".. kept everything to myself.. when i couldn't take it any longer, i just cry out.. its the best way to let out my frustrations.. i wish i could................
Choice In life, there are a lot of choices offered to us. when we are in pri sch with limited pocket money, we had to choose what should we had for recess. a bowl of noodle soup + soft drink or 1 plate of chicky rice without any drink? in sec sch, we are given a choice to choose the subjects we liked. after O's, we had to choose poly or jc. if we opt for poly, which are the courses that we are eligible. and now, i had to choose to leave or stay. well, in fact i had already made my choice. i chose to stay due to certain reasons. but as days go by, i started to feel uncertain about my choice. every morning, i drag myself to work. it feels terrible. going to work, seeing those faces that irks me (@ least things are not so bad for the time being), putting up a false front etc.. the future down the road seemed to be so unsure. it gave me a feeling that i'm travelling in a car with heavy rain pouring outside, whenever the screen wiper wipes the windscreen, the vision gets better. but...
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